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Self-Love Journal 11/14/15
I have to say that I am pretty tired this morning. Last night was a rough night. Gail and I are staying in an Airbnb and the leg of the bed fell off. It was actually pretty funny, but I feel like I didn’t sleep at all.
Today we get to learn a ton from Medical Doctors who are experts in gut health, autism, cardiovascular, brain and more. Then tonight we get to have fun and go to Kinky Boots on Broadway.
I love New York City. I could imagine living here when I was in my 20s. There is so much culture, so many restaurants to try, and walking is the preferred method of transportation. Plus I would never get tired of just observing the people around me.
Yesterday we walked over 8 miles and my Fitbit says that I climbed 23 flights of stairs. Getting exercise in the city would never be an issue. In fact, I need to get going now so that Gail and I can walk to our event.
Self-Love Journal 11/15/15
I am writing this from LaGuardia Airport this morning as I wait for my flight home. I definitely need to make sure I catch up on sleep today. I have only been getting between 5 1/2 and 6 1/2 hrs. of sleep each day for the last 5 days and I know that I function at my best if I get at least 7 hours of sleep each night.
I have done pretty well and haven’t had too much brain fog until today. I have so much that I want to get done and need to get done for my week today, but I am wiped out.
I guess I will have to try to sleep some on the plane and work tonight at home. Kind of bummed about that. I was looking forward to some relaxing family time.
Yesterday was incredible. Last night we went to Kinky Boots on Broadway and it was absolutely amazing! The actors put everything into their performances and I can see why it has won so many Tony Awards.
I also learned a ton yesterday at CASI, but even more I learned how much I want to learn more about gut and brain health. I also learned more about Hashimoto’s.
One of my many takeaways was that our bodies really can heal from almost anything by getting enough sleep, reducing stress by taking better care of ourselves, doing the right exercise and giving our bodies the nutrition it needs.
We really need to take care of ourselves as a whole package and not ignore any part. The great thing for me is that although the Self-Love Project began as a way for me to accept and like the person in the mirror for who she is and not think about whom she was or who she wants to be. This project had evolved into so much more. It has evolved into me learning how to take care of myself as a whole person; physically, emotionally and spiritually.
I realized last week that I no longer criticize myself when I look in the mirror. I also no longer feel fat. I don’t know if I have lost any weight. If I have, I know that it has not been significant. However, I do know that I have had a huge shift in my mindset.
Not only do I feel good about my body image but I also WANT and CRAVE doing good things for ME! I have not felt this way in a long time. In fact, I probably have not felt this way since I was in my late teens, early 20s. I am eating better not because I should but because I feel better when I do. I am moving my body for at least 30 minutes a day not because I should but because I feel really good when I do. I am journaling not because I should but because I learn so much from it and I feel good doing so. I meditate and tap not because I should but because I feel good.
The lesson here is doing good things for me is not a punishment or a chore. Doing good things for me feels good and reduces my stress tremendously. Taking care of “me” is a privilege, not a chore. What is happening in my outside world is not nearly as important as what is going on in my inner world. And my inner world is not spending the entire day beating me up anymore!
Another takeaway this weekend is how much I need my girlfriends. I am very thankful Gail is in my life and I hope that the next time we get together it is to do something fun like meet up in Austin.
I thought I was finished journaling today, but then I read this quote.
I really need to remember this today and during the upcoming week. Especially as I ride with Joshua and find out if my job is in jeopardy due to my inability to meet my sales goals the last two months.
My hope is that they see how much effort I am putting in and how important my job and my doctors are to me. I am willing to take direction and guidance. I love what I do and I think it shows in the value I provide my customers. I have increased the sales in my territory by 60% this year. I pray that it is enough and if it is not I know that the universe has something even better planned for me.
I am a human being and I will spend some time just being today!
If we are paying attention, we get what we need when we need it and I also found this quote today.
I commit to myself and not allow my vision to be muddied with reality nor with other people’s opinions of my reality.
I love my job and I am excellent at it. I do my very best and am committed to learning and even doing better. I will retire from DFH and my territory will continue to increase in volume reflecting my passion and dedication to sharing nutritional therapies to doctors and their patients.
Self-Love Journal 11/16/15
I still have a job! Yay! I had a great day with Joshua today. I am relieved that although he is concerned about the drop in my sales he is not concerned about me. What a weight off of my shoulders. I feel so much better. Gary even said as we were making dinner that it was nice to see me smile again. I had no idea that the stress had been affecting me that bad. I am thrilled that I can now focus on what needs to be done and not worry about losing my job on top of it.
My vision was not muddied. Joshua saw it clearly and purely. J
I picked up the house when I got home from work. Gary does a great job cleaning it but between Brooke and me it gets cluttered very quickly. I wish I could blame it all on Brooke but this time the majority of the clutter was definitely me. It looks much better now.
Ashleigh and Michael came over for dinner. We were trying to barbecue hamburgers, but we ran out of propane so we had to cook them inside. We added yellow squash, zucchini, mushrooms and onions to our sides. We also had a salad from our tower garden.
Gary messed up his hip really bad yesterday. He went and saw Dr. Alan but you could tell that there is still something wrong. He has gotten stuck where he couldn’t move three or four times already tonight. I have given him something to help relax his muscles and help with the inflammation plus put bio freeze on him, but nothing seems to be helping. Poor guy. I hope that tomorrow is a better day for him.
I am absolutely exhausted tonight. I am going to bed early and will try working more on my journaling tomorrow. Joshua rides with me one more day.
Self-Love Journal 11/17/15
Day 10 of detox and I am feeling really good. I am also thankful that Designs for Health has such a simple, convenient and great tasting detox. It makes things so much easier to be able to live life normally as well. Of course, I am sure it helps that we eat pretty clean most of the time. When I say clean, I mean organic grass fed meats, organic produce, gluten-free and very little processed foods. We are also careful to try to avoid sugar, artificial sugars, and high fructose corn syrup.
It will be interesting to see how much we have won Brooke over to our way of thinking at the end of this week. I am sure it won’t be a complete turnaround, but I am chalking up the fact that she wanted to do this detox as a win. And if we can get her to be conscious of how much sugar she eats than that will be another huge win. She is only 15 and she still has lots of time to learn how to make better choices.
It is hard to describe what I feel when I look in the mirror these days. I no longer think about all of the parts of my body that I dislike and wish that I could change. I can actually look in the mirror and think about the parts of my body that I like a lot and that look good.
Self-Love Journal 11/18/15
Wow, I can’t believe that I just about forgot to journal tonight. I got started early and went to Ocala. When I go home around 4, I did my route for tomorrow and then went on a walk with Gary. We made brown rice noodles and sugar-free pasta sauce for dinner. Then I did my test for work on our new CucumEvail product and now I am in bed journaling on my phone in my Evernote application.
Self-care is definitely a topic that I need to work on more. There are many things that I do daily without even thinking about it to treat myself well or even to pamper myself.
- I choose organic when available without worrying about how expensive it is.
- When buying packaged foods, I pay attention to ingredients and I choose foods that are not high in sugar or that have any artificial sweeteners, high fructose corn syrup, gluten and other ingredients that I know are very detrimental to my health.
- I buy beauty products from beautycounter. These are EWG verified not to contain any harmful ingredients. Our skin is our largest organ and we absorb what we put on it into our bloodstream within 30 seconds. Our beauty products are known to cause all sorts of health problems including cancers and messing with our endocrine system.
- I buy cleaning products that are less toxic and I am careful about what I breathe. I know that anything with bleach makes me immediately sick and I avoid breathing these types of products or letting them absorb into my hands.
- I get regular chiropractic adjustments. This is a must. I was in a car accident about 15 years ago and I spend a lot of time in my car. If I don’t get adjusted regularly, I have severe hip and neck pain.
- I usually average 7 hrs. of sleep per night. I am actually in bed longer, but my Fitbit measures my sleep and shows that I am usually awake about 45 min during the night. Tossing and turning about 24 times each night. Poor Gary.
However, taking care of me above and beyond the 6 things listed takes conscious effort.
Since starting the self-love project, I have done more of the following but it all takes focused effort and would be easy to forget or push off to the side during the busy times in my life which is more often than naught.
- Journaling daily
- 30 minutes daily movement
- Mirror affirmations
- Affirmations while driving
- Tapping
- Meditating
I’ve got to go to bed now to get even close to my 7 hrs. now.
Self-Love Journal 11/19/15
Well, hopefully, I won’t be too tired today. I was in bed for over seven hours last night but between waking up 4 times and tossing and turning 26 times I was up for 50 minutes of it and just got short of 6 hours of sleep.
So last night before I went to bed I was talking about taking care of myself. And as I drive to my first appointment this morning it is still dark out and I didn’t have time for a lot of my usual routine before leaving the house. However, I will make sure that I get some tapping in before my meeting I am doing this journal through my voice to text in my Evernote account.
I need to go above the usual things that I do to take care of myself. , I remember my friend Gail telling me probably about a year ago that she was trying to do something nice for herself every week. And I think that is a good place to start. I’ve been thinking about this for a while and it has been difficult for me to come up with a variety of things that I would like to do for myself to take care of myself. But here is a start.
- Getting a massage
- Making sure I take my walk during daylight hours
- Going to lunch with just Heather and me
- Doing something with just Brooke and/or Brooke and Ashleigh
- Going on date nights with Gary
- Lighting candles
- Sitting outside
- Going to the beach
- Going to the movies
- Reading a book
- Reflexology on my feet
- Listening to music
- Cooking with Gary
- Giving myself a facial
- Going to the theater
- Planning individual trips with Gary, family, and friends.
I guess I have quite a few things on my list of extra nice things that I can do for myself. And I do some of these more often than I thought.
For instance, I have been turning on the modern country music channel lately as we cook dinner. Yesterday I listened to music while driving to Ocala instead of one of my work audio. I have been lighting candles at least a couple times a week. I even went upstairs while Gary finished up dinner last night and meditated. It might have just been 10 minutes, but it still was helpful and well worth it. I read most of a fiction suspense thriller while traveling to and from New York last week. A couple of days ago I went for an early walk before Gary got home so that I could enjoy the sunshine. We are going to a movie tomorrow night with Brooke and one of her friends. I am also getting a massage tomorrow.
It has been a long time since I have had a massage it has been awhile since we’ve been to the movies or since I have read affection book. But it is nice to see how many things that I am doing to take care of myself.
I have said before and I believe it even more now. That we need to recognize the little things that we do to take care of ourselves. When we do not acknowledge the things that we do in our daily lives to take care of herself, then it doesn’t relieve the stress or allow us to enjoy these things the way we could with just a simple acknowledgment of “Hey I am taking care of myself. I deserve it. This is something I do for me!”
It comes back to intent. Are we doing these things blindly? Are we doing these things out of obligation because we have to? Or are we doing these things because we deserve something good in our lives?
If we do not show ourselves that we are the most important person in our world then who will? And I’m not talking about being narcissistic; I’m not talking about not caring or not having empathy for others. As caretakers and as people who always puts others first, this is not going to change. I’m not changing my personality or the core of who I am. All I am saying is that I am important to me. I deserve to be taken care of too and if I am happy that it allows me to take care of everybody else. It allows me to bring more happiness to other people’s life because I have more happiness to share.
Self-Love Journal 11/20/15
The last few weeks have been focused on self-care. I think the important takeaways for me are that I need to acknowledge all of the things I do to take care of myself, even the little things. This acknowledgment is as important as the actual acts themselves. I also need to be intentional about doing extra nice things for me each week.
As I finish up the week, I am feeling very grateful for my family.
I am thankful for Gary. He always brings out the best in me and although he supports me entirely, he also helps me. When I change my eating habits, he changes his. When I start working out more, he starts working out more with me. When I need help with work, he doesn’t just tell me I can do it – he gives good input. This is a type of partnership that I have never had and I am thankful that I get to experience it.
I am thankful for Heather. That she continues to challenge me as a Mom. It is hard to watch her grow up and make mistakes that I wish I could keep her from. But I am thankful that I get to be there for her through it all. I am thankful that for all that she has been through in her life that she is still a happy go lucky young lady who is super sweet and would give someone the shirt off her back if she thought it was necessary. I am thankful that she is determined to finish school even though it is extremely difficult for her to go to school full time, to work full time and to be a mom. I am thankful for little man. I am thankful for his smiles and his giggles. I am thankful that I get to see him regularly.
I am thankful for Brooke. It is so much fun watching her grow up and explore the type of person that she wants to be. Because Brooke is always thinking two steps ahead, she keeps me on my toes. She is a brilliant young lady in both books and common sense. It will be fun to continue to watch her take on the world. With that said, I am also glad that we don’t battle too often. Not sure how much I would win. 🙂
I am thankful for Michael and Ashleigh. Getting to know them and watch them navigate through life as young adults has made me very happy. I can remember facing similar challenges when I was their age and it is great to watch them make better choices than I did. They both will go far in life and I can see them achieving whatever they truly want.
There are so many other people that I am thankful for as well, but there is not enough time to write about everyone this morning. It is Friday and it will be a great day. I have quite a few doctors that I need to see today and I have to prepare for that. Plus I also need to complete the Self-Love Project for the week.
I am looking forward to later, though. I get to have my massage and then I will enjoy the outdoors and go for a relaxing walk after I get home. Tonight we are going to Hunger Games, Mocking Jay, Part 2. It is going to be a great day.
As per a Louise Hay affirmation that I read this week.
LOOKING IN THE MIRROR
I love you; I really, really love you. There are great experiences coming your way today. You look wonderful. You have the best smile. Your makeup and hair look perfect. You are my ideal woman. We are having a terrific day today. I love you dearly.
I had a few interesting conversations recently.
Yesterday, I was talking with a doctor who told me that he could help me lose weight. My first thought was what is he talking about? First of all he is at least 40-50 pounds overweight and secondly I am just fine the way I am, I do not need to go on this guy’s crazy diet plan.
What a huge shift in mindset this is for me over the last several months. It feels good to feel good about me. I may need to lose a few pounds still but if my body intends to lose it, then it will. I am doing all of the right things this time and my body will reset itself as it feels it needs to. It is much wiser than I am or that doctor. Seriously man.
The other conversation was with Brooke this morning on sugar. Today will be the first day she has had sugar in several weeks and we talked about how much different she feels. How she is in a better mood, gets ready easier in the mornings, sits and talks with me in the mornings (this never happened before, I would only get a grunt out of her previously if I were lucky). She has gone for a run and has felt better over all. I asked her to try to eat less sugar today than she normally would. And to try to be conscious of how sugar, dairy, and gluten affect her as she introduces them back into her diet. I am sure that she will go back to eating all of these foods but if she is a little more aware of how they affect how she feels; and she eats them a little less often than her dad and I will be very happy.
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Self-Love Takeaways Week 9
- If we do not show ourselves that we are the most important person in our world then who will? And I’m not talking about being narcissistic; I’m not talking about not caring or not having empathy for others. As caretakers and as people who always puts others first, this is not going to change. I’m not changing my personality or the core of who I am. All I am saying is that I am important to me. I deserve to be taken care of too and if I am happy that it allows me to take care of everybody else. It allows me to bring more happiness to other people’s life because I have more happiness to share.
- I need to be intentional about doing extra nice things for me each week.
- Getting a massage
- Making sure I take my walk during daylight hours
- Going to lunch with just Heather and me
- Doing something with just Brooke and/or Brooke and Ashleigh
- Going on date nights with Gary
- Lighting candles
- Sitting outside
- Going to the beach
- Going to the movies
- Reading a book
- Reflexology on my feet
- Listening to music
- Cooking with Gary
- Giving myself a facial
- Going to the theater
- Planning individual trips with Gary, family and friends.
To see other Self-Love Takeaways click here.